Test

A man named Gerry asked his doctor if there was a test to help him determine if he was gay. The Doctor said, "Yes, there is. Please pull down your pants."

Gerry pulled down his pants, the doctor grabbed his testicles and told him to "say 55."

Gerry said "55." The doctor then grabbed Gerry's penis and told him to "say 55."

Gerry said "55."

The doctor then told Gerry to turn around, and putting a finger in Gerry's anus he once again told him to "say 55."

.... Gerry said "1...2...3..."

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Experienced?

MrsPerfesser was telling Rotunda, "The old perfesser wasn't too experienced when we got married, you know."

"My goodness," said Rotunda, "and just how do you know that?"

"Because," said MrsPerfesser, "on our wedding night, he tried to inflate me!"

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WANK SEANCE

During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that you're being watched with disgust by your dead relatives.

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"I want you to explain," demanded MrsPerfesser hotly, "why I have to wear these same old clothes, month after month?!"

"Because if you didn't," said the old perfesser, "you'd scare the dog!"

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The other old perfesser asked, "How long since you've had sex?"

"Sheesh," said the old perfesser, "THAT'S a pretty darned personal question, ain't it?"

"Ooh, that long, huh?" hmmmm'd the other old perfesser.

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It is two o'clock in the morning and a husband and his wife are sound asleep when suddenly the phone rings. The husband picks up the phone and says, "Hello? How the heck do I know? What am I, the weather man?" and promptly slams the phone down.

His wife rolls over and asks, "Who was that?"

The husband replies, "I don't know, it was some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."

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Grafitti found in restrooms around the US:

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.
* Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
* Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Make love, not war. - Hell, do both, get married!

Beauty is only a light switch away.
* Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

No wonder you always go home alone.
* Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills,CA.

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
* Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, Kentucky.

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Updated 10.6.2017 10:35
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